Asking The Tough Questions

"Here's an idea. Stop thinking Jade, yeah, you heard me. I mean is what you're worrying about really that important? And will worrying about it all really change the situation you find yourself in? Will you ever actually be content enough to fall asleep at night without a thought crossing your mind? Or will you toss and turn till you wake up and find the whole world empty and they forgot to take you to be with peace?"

Breathe me.


Headphones in the ear and my volume bar is fully coloured. Never has music pierced into my soul and left a mark. Usually it's in one ear & out the other with me, with very little time to stick & manifest into something that I can't control. I never let it, I mean why should I? However when you are thirsty for that power of affection & honest answers you will consume whatever is in your reach. To which I am always left thirsty. Ah well, thank God for other options ey? I guess that's all I have to be honest about, God does deserve all the thanks. Even through all the crap & heartache, He manages to hold my hand. Never once looking me in the eye & telling me I need to be strong, but leaving room for me to not be okay. Leaving room for me to cry & loose my cool at the smallest of things. Because He knows they aren't really that small, He knows very well that they are the biggest of things, my breathing apparatus & ironically the complete opposite. My life lines are running thin yet my smile never lies. My eyes do, but don't we all have our bad habits? Loosing more control over my choice of words rather than my ability to react and let me tell you, my reaction to life is unpredictable. The ones that know that already are one step ahead of me & reach it before I do.


"Here's an idea. Stop thinking Jade, yeah you heard me..."
and Here's what I say to that.... Thank-you for listening to me.


Signing off,
You're sleepless girl.