But wait there's more

Sometimes life takes you by surprise.
Like the day my family told me they are relocating to QLD in the following 2 months which gave me 2 months notice before I had no place to live... Or the time rent was due and I hadn't budgeted for it and sat up all night feeling sorry for myself.
Or how about that time your little sister tells you she is no longer a kid and has managed to say "no" to drugs more in 1 year than you have ever in your lifetime.

Or how about that time you took your old job to court because you were sexually harassed and the commissioner looking into your eyes and saying there is nothing they can do. There will always be that time I ticked the wrong box on my Tax form and got taxed 30% on my first Full Time Pay. Or the moment I finally got the job I have been fighting 3 years for...

My life has come to abit of a halt lately. Not a Saturday night goes by without thinking about maybe going to church the following day. Or setting alarms to get up for gym every morning and NEVER actually getting up. I think things have changed alot since I moved out of home or since my family moved up to QLD. For the first time ever I have been the favorite child with having a job and considering study. I can sit and talk business with Dad but my sister can't. That's the only upper hand I have. Recently she has also considered study and got a job so I believe I have found my place in second..

It's funny how people change and these people are meant to be your own flesh and blood... But something in them feels they need to compete with you? Like it's a game.
I want nothing but to feel accepted within his family and when it comes down to who is praying more or who is working harder... it can all get lost as to how much of a family we are. I learnt this when my dad admitted himself into a mental home 50 minutes away from my step mum and she didn't even care. I watched my dad sit through a wedding doped up on pills of Valium and his daughter laughing at him. Being the only one taking care of him, I have never felt so low about family in my life.

I have learnt that as long as your heart is in the right place and you are humble... things will work out for you. That doesn't mean that it will make your life peachy and everything will be perfect, it just means you will soldier on and become a better person than you were.

I look forward to learning humility- knowing that life will happen. But I can control my own and hold my own. And that's enough to keep my wanting to grow.

Singing off,

Your hopeful girl.